Approaching the End

As one approaches the end of one's life,though, I hope, not any time soon, one tends to both look back and look ahead, with equal intensity. What one has accomplished,has been and where one has gone, all combine to make you who you are today and to prepare you for who you will become tomorrow. Essentially, you will be the same person, but with subtle changes, assuming that you are not contemplating an early departure from this mortal coil. But since life is an evolution and not a script, you will continue to grow as both a person and an artist. Looking back on your life gives one a great perspective on where to take the remainder of it.Things you have yet to experience and images you have yet to capture/create are undoubtedly a part of the process, but what of things and images you have already accomplished?

What prompted this entry, was a piece in the Guardian newspaper about a favourite photographer of mine, Bruce Davidson, who wishes to discover whatever happened to a young girl that he photographed some 50 years ago, in England. At the time, she was on her way to a concert, on an island,most probably the Isle of Wight or the Isle of Man and carrying a kitten. The shot is one most fans of the photographer will remember. Seeing it again and reading the article, I began to wonder if such an image,existed for me?I realised that there were, in fact, several. Some were of people and others of buildings or landscapes, places or things. Could I return to them to find them today? In some cases, I am certain, not, but in others perhaps they could be revisited and re-explored. Likewise, were the things I have not yet gotten to. Would I still be able to capture those, as yet unseen, pieces of my "bucket list"? Certainly some of them, I would want to think, but perhaps not all.

I am far from staring at my imminent demise, but I can see the light in the clearing, at the end of the path and although it does not frighten me, in any way, it is starting to lend an urgency to my outlook on the future. There are a host of images that I have not yet taken, many, many places that I have not visited and I realise, more than a few that I would like to re-visit. Then there are the many non photographic adventures that I still wish to embark upon and a few personal goals that are left to be satisfied. Time marches on and I, like most others, am only a few steps ahead of the old gentleman! So, the question is, will I persevere and press on with my life and my dreams, or let him catch up and try to be satisfied with what I have? At my age, 62, many people would simply rest on their laurels and wait. I will not. I will not, mostly because my laurels are not that impressive and I know I can do better, but also because life is a grand adventure and should not be squandered, nor short changed. When one embarks upon an endeavour, one has an obligation to see it through. My chosen endeavour was to live a full life and to chronicle as much of it as I could manage. Neither goal has been accomplished, as yet and I owe it to myself to see them through. I wouldn't be the person I think I am if I did not.